This is the last holiday season before the dawning of 2012. The ancients tell us to live from the heart – let go of our grudges and grievances – live in Truth. How can I live from my heart this holiday season? It is impossible – you don’t know my family!
One cause of stress and disappointment is the unrealistic expectations we hold for the holiday season. The movie we have in our head is of cozy fires, twinkle lights, big fluffy snowflakes – laughter and loving talks. When this movie in your head gets overshadowed by reality – fighting and arguing, burned food, unexpressed anger and boozy negative talk – it can cause much suffering.
Deep down we all want to be in Truth – it is our essence – we are just out of practice.
5 Ways to Be in Truth with Your Family this Holiday Season
1. Within Each Person lies an Inner Battlefield
Don’t let outer appearances fool you – each person is going through their unique challenges as we move more and more into the Aquarian Age. Become present with people and feel them and you will begin to see (with the 3rd eye) their pain. Don’t look to them to validate your findings – the ego views this kind of vulnerability as death. Beam love from your heart and bless them as you listen – this is what it means to have compassion for others.
2. Don’t be Nice – Be Real ! And Turn off the TV too !
Stop doing things just for the approval of others. If you don’t want the food or the booze ~ just say no thank you with no explanation required. Let mother’s ego feel hurt if you don’t like her white-poison-desert or some other foods she has prepared. Usually people just want to bond – say to dad no I don’t want to drink but I do want to spend time with you. Families will often have the TV blaring in the middle of the room – a handy distraction from reality. Suggest to turn off the TV, go for a walk, talk, play games or cook together.
3. Deliver your Soul’s Gift this Holiday Season
Before we incarnated to this life, we chose our family of origin. It is important to remember that we came here to deliver our soul gifts to help our families to heal. Start by taking note of what you complain about. What do you feel your family never gave you? This is exactly what you are to give to them. If you feel they never fully accepted you – practice accepting them. Bring true forgiveness and acceptance to everyone involved. Be open to members of your family changing and healing.
4. Let Go of the Past by Healing the Present
When families gather, stories from the past will inevitably come up. “Remember the time Uncle John was so drunk he fell on the Christmas tree.” “Remember when black sheep sister ruined Christmas by burning the turkey ha,ha, ha.” Share your perspective and experience of the past from an authentic place. Own your experience and do not feel threatened by the judgment of others – speak your Truth even if your voice trembles. When you are aligned with Truth you are aligned with the power of the Universe. Also honor other’s perspective of their experience. Perhaps ask the question, “Why do we tell this story over and over? Is there something unfinished in this story? How can we let it go?”
5. Resist the Urge to Escape
If family dynamics or thoughts from the past are overwhelming you – the mind will want to escape – resist the urge to self-medicate through eating and drinking too much. Remove yourself from the situation and meditate Wherever you are, there will be a bathroom to escape to. Lock the door and breathe deeply.
Try this simple 3 mins meditation to get yourself together:
Kundalini Yoga Meditation for Emotional Balance
Place your arms across the chest and lock hands under the armpits, palms open and against the body.
Raise the shoulders up tight reaching toward the earlobes Apply Neck Lock by tucking the neck in toward the chest with the spine straight.
Eyes are closed. Concentrate on how the breath changes automatically in this position.
The breath will automatically become slow. Continue for 3-5 minutes. You can gradually increase the time to 11 minutes
Pulling the shoulders up toward the ears and tightly locking the entire area creates a solid break to the four sides of the brain. After 2 or 3 minutes, thoughts will be there, but one does not feel them. This is a very effective method of balancing the brain.
To end, relax the hands down, sit quietly and enjoy your inner space of peace. You will notice that you have created a space independent of your rational mind. Your mind will still have thoughts and you can observe them, but you can choose to be in your peaceful space or neutral mind.